J’ai vraiment intelligente! Toi aussi?

I suffer from a constant need to apologize. It’s a very Canadian trait, and can be (is) pretty irritating to those around me. I (always) say something awkward? I’m sorry. I win the board game? I’m sorry. Someone bumps into me with their shopping cart? I’m sorry.

I saturate the internet with longwinded blog entries and rants, filled with improper grammar and an obvious love affair with commas? Really, I’m sorry.

The most unfortunate side effect of this is that, when lacking in things to apologize for, I create them. I will take the most minor infraction and grovel at your feet. Honest.

In this instance, I am going to apologize to you, dear reader (Dad) for my original introduction to this blog. It really gave you no information at all. This was completely deliberate on my part. It was a gimmick. I wanted to be vague; I wanted to give myself a false air of mystery so that you would be compelled to keep reading. (Did it work?)

But I am here to rectify that!

This blog entry won’t be a rant. Instead I am going to take this opportunity to tell you 12 things about myself. 13 if you count my propensity to apologize – ah heck, let’s count it! I may as well go for a baker’s dozen!

So, without further ado, I bring to you twelve facts about SMRP:

1) I love dinosaurs. This stems from my childhood believe that triSARAHtops were named after me. Even after the crushing disappointment of learning that it is, in fact, spelled triceratops, I still love dinosaurs. Jurassic Park FTW!

2) I talk smack. A Lot. And I only talk smack for things that I can’t back up. I also like to challenge people much stronger than me to fisticuffs. It’s part of living dangerously.

3) I have horrible taste in Television. My love of classic shows like Dr. Who and Veronica Mars is balanced by my obsession with Highlander and the BBC Robin Hood. The cheesier the show, the more I love it.

4) That being said, I also have terrible taste in Music. For every Josh Ritter and Black Keys album on my Ipod there is an equal number of Miley Cyrus and Glee songs. (My latest obsession? Score: The Hockey Musical Soundtrack)

And, you guessed it,

5) I love, love, love bad movies. Conan? Amazing! Excalibur? Hilarious! The movie Outlander actually made it into my Top Ten Movies of ALL TIME. (Aliens? Check. Vikings? Check. Time Travel? Check. A freaking Dragon? CHECK! What’s not to love?)

6) I have an uncanny ability to make every situation awkward. ‘Nuff said.

7) I cheat on “Which House?” quizzes so that I can end up in Ravenclaw when I really belong in Hufflepuff. (Can you tell I’m a diehard Harry Potter fan?)

8 ) I have a serious obsession with Travel. I collect travel books and make collages. Taped to my closet door is a list of destinations I need to visit and things I need to do before I turn 35.

9) My signature dance move is the Penguin. It’s pretty amazing.

10) I can’t bake under pressure. Explanation? A batch of cookies made for my own gluttonous enjoyment? Delicious! A cake baked to bring to a friend’s house? Densely disgusting.

11) Following number ten, I have a love of alliteration and rhyming. Honestly, I write terrible poetry all the time just to get my fix.

Which brings me to …

12) I love to write, but I was crippled early on by misplaced arrogance. When I was younger everyone told me that I could and should write, which went straight to my head. Now I only write for myself as I am too terrified of people thinking I didn’t fulfill my “potential”.

So, do feel as if you know me any better?

Enough Already with the Melancholy! (or, Privileges of Prairie Living)

Panic attack aside, I suppose we all need to grow up sometime.

My move back to the West Coast is fast approaching and it is mindboggling how quickly the time has gone by. With only a month and a half left I am finally realizing the consequences of my decision. My entire post-high school life has been lived out here. College. Breakups. The finale of Gilmore Girls. How does one leave this behind?

I’ve been spending a lot of time reflecting on the soon to be nostalgic moments of my Prairie life. There are so many things I will remember fondly as I block out the miserable memories of -40 and bed bugs. I have so many memories from what now seems like a short four and a half year stint; too many memories to list.

But my OCD won’t let me leave this alone.

Instead I am left with a list of things I will miss the most, in no particular order. I bring to you, my friend, the Privileges of Prairie Living:

1)      Whyte Avenue and my False Sense of Popularity: as a side effect of working on the avenue I am constantly running into people I know. I loved this whenever Victoria friends came to visit; it made me seem so much more popular.

2)      The High Level Bridge at night: Standing on the High Level at night, with the stars out and city lit up, will probably be my most vivid memory of Edmonton.

3)      Bad Movie Nights: there is something to be said about deliberately watching “bad” movies. Listening to Tana and the guys’ running commentary is even funnier than an evening at Chimprov.

4)      Artisan and O’Byrnes (especially my hard earned and extremely precarious “Bro Status”): Breakfast and Pub Times with the boys, quoting Aqua Teen Hunger Force and telling bad jokes while watching them (attempt to) hit on the waitresses. +5 for awesomeness.

5)      The Elmhurst: the most epic apartment building and tenants of all time. (Also, Telephone Pictionary and Zak’s comic book collection for the win).

6)      My roommates (especially when accompanied by Hot Chocolate and Bailey’s)

7)      Improv! Festivals! Pretending I am Cultured!: I love, love, love the sheer number of things going on in this city.

8)      Nerding it Up, TV on DVD Style with Jeff/Geoff/Tana/Tim: Entire evenings (or days) spent watching BSG, Doctor Who, Dead Zone and Chuck (always watching “just one more episode”).

9)      Prairie Thunder Storms: we do get electrical storms in Victoria, but they are nothing like the ones out here.

10)   Monday Night Yoga and Cocktails with Nicole

I am notoriously indecisive and have, though I’m embarrassed to admit it, spent the last few weeks sure that something would happen and I wouldn’t end up leaving (as has happened for the last two years). Now, with 41 boxes of my stuff gathering dust in Victoria, I’ve had to realize that I actually am moving. This is really happening.

“Hello Point of No Return, I am pleased to make your acquaintance. Please excuse me while I breathe into this paper bag for the next half hour.”