Grown Up

I have never felt more like an adult than I did last night.
 I was standing in my new kitchen, peeling and chopping a butternut squash for a healthy dinner. The whole experience was very adult-ish.

Side Note: Does it make me seem less like a grown up when I immediately call my Dad to tell him I am acting like a grown up?

Additional Side Note: Squash is delicious.

Extra Additional Side Note: I hate when people say “delish”.

 

Actual Science, Probably

A ground breaking study proves that visiting your friend in Victoria BC leads to a happier, longer life.

Recently conducted by a moderately well respected person who frequently reads science fiction, a new study believes it has proven that frequent visits to Victoria, British Columbia can not only lead to a happier life but a longer one.

“In recent years many studies have been linking happiness to healthier habits and longer life expectancy so this study really is an offshoot of those” says Miss Porter, the driving force behind this research. “I mean, anyone with Google can tell you that!”

When asked to explain her research Miss Porter cited many links, including this article from 2011, which she admittedly only skimmed (but she for sure got the gist of it).

Victoria, BC is widely believed to be one of the top destinations to visit in Canada, known for its beauty, diversity, and abundance of Craft Breweries. Lovely all year round, Victoria also boasts an interesting history and with the dwindling Canadian dollar coupled with recently announced direct flights from Dublin to Vancouver now is the time to come!

Miss Porter is confident that the entire scientific community agrees with and supports her findings. As well, she hopes to continue her study in 2016 or 2017 by encouraging her good friend to visit from Ireland which will help provide more concrete research.

More to come.

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One of the many delightful places to visit, the Breakwater in Victoria BC is a popular tourist spot.

Lessons Learned in a Galaxy Far, Far Away

Dear George Lucas,

There is nothing that I can say that hasn’t been said a million times already (mostly by people far more eloquent than myself). You have disappointed me time and time again. Still, I suppose I owe you a thank you.

Thank you, Mr. Lucas, not just for creating one of the most beloved trilogies of all time, the brilliant space epic “Star Wars”, but also for teaching me about disappointment and tragedy.

No, I am not talking about the disappointment Luke Skywalker felt at being forced to stay and help with the farm on Tatooine or the tragedy of Alderaan being blown up.

I am talking about the disappointment of you claiming Han shot first. I am speaking to the tragedy that is ‘Phantom Menace’.

What were you thinking?

Why couldn’t you just leave well enough alone?

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I dislike you and your smug face.

I get that CGI is cool and the additions to the Cantina scene weren’t terrible, but why did you have to add Hayden Christensen to ‘Return of the Jedi’? How does that even make sense? HOW?!

Don’t get me wrong, I don’t hate everything about Star Wars Episodes 1, 2, and 3.

I just hate most of everything about them.

Am I being a bit harsh?

I apologize; I suppose the wounds are still fresh.

Truthfully I was ready to forgive you for the way you stomped on my childhood but then you gave us ‘Indiana Jones 4’ and I realized some people just like to watch the world burn.

Upon realizing this darkness of your soul I cracked open a bottle of bubbly (Coca Cola, not Champagne … what do you think? I’m not made of money!) the day it was announced that the Star Wars Franchise had been sold to Disney. They will treat it right (I hope) while exploiting all possible marketing opportunities  and I couldn’t be happier.

I am going to buy so many toys! Though I suppose as a self-respecting adult I should start calling them ‘collectables’.

Despite my deep dislike for you, I still wish you all the best in your life.

And I suppose deep down I am thankful for you teaching me these lessons. Despite how often my parents tried to teach me that life isn’t fair you were really the one who hammered that home and for that I am grateful.

Sincerely,

SMRP

PS. I don’t suppose there is a chance I can come visit the Skywalker Ranch? I promise to be so, so polite (Obviously, I am Canadian!).

The Judgement Bus

Yesterday while I was on the bus to work a 14 year old girl decided to read over my shoulder and then proceeded to judge me.

Girl: “Aren’t you a bit old to be reading Harry Potter?”
Me: “No.”

*Insert glare*

How rude!

And wrong!

There are many things I am unsure about in this crazy world, but one thing I know for certain is that you are never too old to read Harry Potter.

In fact I would go so far as to say that if you aren’t rereading Harry Potter every few years than your life is empty.

Empty and sad.

Technology: The Art of False Victories

I have been known to be a bit obsessive from time to time (all the time). It is at once both an endearing and incredibly irritating trait and tends to drive people bonkers. Still, it is a part of who I am and, though I work hard to ensure my obsessiveness does not take over my entire psyche, I have learned to live with it.

Accepting and living with my OCD has actually gotten easier in the last few years.

You see, Dear Reader, one of my biggest compulsive ticks is that I can’t stand it when things do not open on my computer in the correct order. I like to have my Outlook open first (mailbox then calendar), followed by the Internet Browser, Excel and then Word.
That’s not too weird, right? Lots of people like things just so!

When this tick first developed I would actually need to restart my computer if the programs opened in the wrong order or if, God Forbid, I accidentally closed one. Over time I managed to dial it down a bit so I only had to close EVERYTHING and reopen them in the correct order and no longer had to restart. This was a vast improvement.

But over the last year I have noticed a huge difference. I no longer restart or close programs dozens of times a day. No, now I can work like a normal person, leaving programs where they open all willy nilly.

I have been so proud of the strides I have made, persevering against all odds.

Or, that is to say, I HAD been so proud.

My joy at having beaten this quirk was dashed aside when I was notified that my overcoming this OCD tick wasn’t really a victory at all but a bi-product of a Microsoft Windows update.

The credit for my milestone instead goes to whoever the genius was (is?) that invented ‘pinning programs to your task bar’.

I owe this person my deepest and most sincere thanks. (Even if they did steal my thunder. Asshole.)

I suppose I am grateful. Not having to restart or close everything dozens of times a day has made me more productive. But alas, that productiveness is tinged with the bitterness of knowing Microsoft is an enabler.

For shame, Microsoft. For shame.

Crises Averted (Just A Little Bit)

Kevin and I saved the world last Sunday.

You’re welcome.

Ok fine, ‘saved the world’ could also be interpreted as ‘beat Pandemic Legacy Season 1’ but the two are so closely related as to be interchangeable.

I mean, obviously our binge playing of Pandemic Legacy has prepared us to take on any world catastrophe of the epidemic variety.

We are seasoned professionals.

So, once again, you’re welcome.

I hope you all have a fabulous weekend and rest easy knowing that Kevin and I are here in case any super diseases outbreak.
(Unless curing super diseases actually takes real medical skill and doesn’t involve collecting 5 cards of the same colour. But what are the odds of that?)

Ok. I have a terrible confession to make.

Brace yourselves, Dear Readers …

My bragging is all for show.

The truth is that while we did beat the game, we also made a mistake towards the end that I feel robs us of our victory.

We unknowingly cheated and therefore everything feels cheapened. Sure, we still would have won, but the end results could have been so different!

Honestly, I have not stopped stressing about this since we found out the truth and have even been trying to convince Kevin that we need to buy a new copy of the game so we can play it through again without accidentally cheating. He is not on board with this suggestion.
(On board?! BOARD GAME PUN! HAHAHAHAHA.)

I need to know if I can win properly!

And what if Season 2 of Pandemic Legacy builds off of Season 1? How will I be able to play Season 2 knowing that the end results on Season 1 are wrong? That we are starting a new season under false pretenses?

These are important questions!

One of these days I will learn to stop obsessing about things I cannot change, but that will probably come after I have had a chance to beat Pandemic Legacy. Again. Properly.

Happy Friday, Dear Readers. I hope your weekend is less anxiety filled than mine.

Pandemia-Legacy-

I found this picture on the Interwebs.

Ghostly Guests

I am 37% sure there is a ghost in my apartment.

I know what you’re thinking, Dear Reader. 37% doesn’t sound THAT sure but trust me, that is about as confident I get.

The ghost seems friendly enough: A dark figure seen from the corner of my eye, a weird prickling down my neck that doesn’t feel sinister – just off, and that stubbornly persistent old man smell that has permeated my apartment for the last two years and definitely does not come from me.

Compiling information from this overwhelming evidence I can only conclude that the ghost is that of a fairly nice old man who likes to hang out by my kitchen.

Or perhaps an overactive imagination, but that doesn’t seem nearly as likely.

No. It’s definitely a ghost.

I am 37% sure which is basically positive.

This is my "Ghost Sighting" Face. It's a lot like my normal, everyday face.

This is my “Ghost Sighting” Face. It’s a lot like my normal, every day face.