Technology: The Art of False Victories

I have been known to be a bit obsessive from time to time (all the time). It is at once both an endearing and incredibly irritating trait and tends to drive people bonkers. Still, it is a part of who I am and, though I work hard to ensure my obsessiveness does not take over my entire psyche, I have learned to live with it.

Accepting and living with my OCD has actually gotten easier in the last few years.

You see, Dear Reader, one of my biggest compulsive ticks is that I can’t stand it when things do not open on my computer in the correct order. I like to have my Outlook open first (mailbox then calendar), followed by the Internet Browser, Excel and then Word.
That’s not too weird, right? Lots of people like things just so!

When this tick first developed I would actually need to restart my computer if the programs opened in the wrong order or if, God Forbid, I accidentally closed one. Over time I managed to dial it down a bit so I only had to close EVERYTHING and reopen them in the correct order and no longer had to restart. This was a vast improvement.

But over the last year I have noticed a huge difference. I no longer restart or close programs dozens of times a day. No, now I can work like a normal person, leaving programs where they open all willy nilly.

I have been so proud of the strides I have made, persevering against all odds.

Or, that is to say, I HAD been so proud.

My joy at having beaten this quirk was dashed aside when I was notified that my overcoming this OCD tick wasn’t really a victory at all but a bi-product of a Microsoft Windows update.

The credit for my milestone instead goes to whoever the genius was (is?) that invented ‘pinning programs to your task bar’.

I owe this person my deepest and most sincere thanks. (Even if they did steal my thunder. Asshole.)

I suppose I am grateful. Not having to restart or close everything dozens of times a day has made me more productive. But alas, that productiveness is tinged with the bitterness of knowing Microsoft is an enabler.

For shame, Microsoft. For shame.

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13 thoughts on “Technology: The Art of False Victories

  1. Girl, I would totally steal some of that thunder back! You deserve it! Or at least write a very strongly-worded email to Microsoft, right before but not after opening Internet explorer, Excel and then Word.
    Confession: I have my own way of doing things too. The first thing to open for me? Spotify. Every. Damn, Time. I must have my tunes jamming before any productivity can commence.

  2. The Micosoft campus is a sea of OCD. Everyone knows that. It is why things are the way they are and will always be that way. It is not just Redmond, it started in Mountain View, spread to Santa Clara and consumes every design studio from San Francisco to Brooklyn.

    For a little background, read an old essay by Science and the Compulsive Programmer by Joseph Weizenbaum.

  3. I don’t know if I’m OCD or not, it’s weird because I have some of the traits, but then other complete opposite ocd issues. With the computer though I get so annoyed when all of my programs open automatically and the time to takes so when I start my computer I just have to go away for like five minutes until it’s done everything on it’s own before I can look back at it!

  4. Damn Microsoft, always stealing somebodies thunder. Now they’re trying to steal yours, Sarah. I’d sue them, but then I’m into baseless lawsuits that I can’t possibly win. You on the other hand, have an ALMOST baseless lawsuit, which means that it only stands a 95% chance of failure compared to my nearly 99.5% chance of failure. Surely this should nearly—but not quite—almost brighten your fantasy of holiday shopping with an almost full purse of cash. 😀

      • Well done, Sarah. Take that Harvard! Who needs you? We’re going to own Microsoft, then you’ll want to represent us in other baseless lawsuits. Until then, I’m going to be represented by the law firm of Tri, Sarah and Tops—they’re the best ambulance chasers in the business. 😀

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