The False Geek (or, Jumping on the Bandwagon)

There are a lot of things I don’t like (I’m quite ornery).

I don’t like abbreviations and lack of grammar in text messages. U? R? These are letters, not words. Spell it out, folks!

My soul dies a little every time someone pronounces A.S.A.P as ASAP. Unless you work in a hospital or are a cast member from Grey’s Anatomy you have no reason to say ASAP. No reason at all.

Authors who use their real name to sell work written under their pseudonym irritate me. (Don’t get me wrong, I understand the marketing strategy behind “Nora Roberts writing as J.D. Robb”, but understanding the reason doesn’t make the end result any less annoying.)

But my current pet peeve? The Faux Nerd.

As long as there have been trends there has been the bandwagon. Now, jumping on the bandwagon isn’t to be confused with discovering you like something after it becomes popular.

It is perfectly acceptable to discover a newfound love of the Black Keys after seeing them on SNL. It’s only natural to discover a love of Batman after watching the reboot. Discovering you like something after it becomes popular is inevitable. How were you supposed to know you liked something you’d never heard of? We can’t all scour the internet for new trends before they become mainstream. (This is not meant to scorn trendsetters; I am very impressed by people with a seemingly endless knowledge of the obscurely cool. Seriously.)

What’s the distinction? Bandwagon jumpers will pretend they have always liked something.

Being a nerd has become trendy. It is now cool to read comic books and wear t-shirts with video game references. Robot Chicken has made it acceptable to quote Star Wars and tell sci-fi jokes. Nerdy is the new cool and I’m ok with that.

(I’m actually more than ok with it. I’m happy about it. Finally, after years of being a social outcast – not to be confused with Outkast; I was never a part of that group, though I do love to “shake it like a Polaroid picture” – I am one of the cool kids.)

Just don’t pretend that you have always embraced geek culture when you used to beat me up for playing Magic Cards. Reading a few Wikipedia articles and buying a t-shirt does not make you a lifelong fan. In fact, it makes you a jackass.

I earned my nerd status through years of social awkwardness.

My Friday nights were spent watching First Contact and playing Final Fantasy. My summers were a mix of perfecting combos on SNES and inventing games like “Bench Ball” and “Dough Tag”. I used to get up early on weekdays so I could watch Highlander reruns before school (7am on Showcase, bitches) and stay up well past midnight writing FanFiction. Even my brief gothic teenage rebellion involved reading my brother’s DnD books and listening to Weezer while my bright red hair and borrowed yellow t-shirt paid homage to the Dark Phoenix.

My lack of social awareness isn’t a trend; it’s a defining character trait.

But I digress. This rant isn’t about my years as a human punching bag. No. This rant is about those who want to pretend that they have always been geeks. It’s about the people whose favourite X-Men character is “Deadwood”. The same people who have always loved Star Trek, “especially the series with the really cool bald captain … you know, Captain Kirk?”

These people bother me.

And they should bother you too.

2 thoughts on “The False Geek (or, Jumping on the Bandwagon)

  1. *Please note that Deadwood was an HBO Western Series, Deadpool is the X-Men Character and Picard was the cool bald captain (Next Gen!) and William Shatner still isn’t bald.

    • The worse part for me about the whole Star Trek Captain thing was everyone saying “Even Julia knows that”…..why must I be the example?

      Kudos on your years of social awkwardness finally paying off….although I distinctly remember you teasing our dear big brother with me for playing Magic the Gathering 😉

      Please continue your various rants. They make me do my happy dance!

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